2012,

May it be a better year than 2011. 

Don't really know what to expect but I really hope it would be a better year than 2011! Things aren't looking very good recently but I believe that everything happens for a reason and everything will turn out just fine someday. 

I just have to let go and let God. The only thing that got better is the trust I have in God.

Either I find a way to trust you, or I let go of this. 

Evidently, I don't trust you enough. 

I hate how you could make me feel like the happiest girl alive and sometimes the most unconfident girl in this world. 

"How are you going to deal with this in the future?" is the only question I've been asking myself the whole day. I finally understood why my mom didn't end up marrying some rich boy who was going to be a doctor or a lawyer. 

I don't care about the number of houses you are going to have under your name, or the numerous cars that you can afford. I just want to be happy. 

I have so much to work on with myself, especially when it comes to building the self-esteem and facing people who would put you down so that it would make them feel better about themselves. 

So I woke up this morning feeling unusually excited about something but I can't seem to figure what it is. Actually no, I think I woke up better yesterday because for once in a very long time, I told myself that "I am going for lecture today". It's been 4 weeks since school has started and it definitely doesn't feel like 4 weeks at all. Time really flies when you're all settled and having fun in school. After living in Perth for one and a half years, I have unknowingly regarded this place as a second home. Didn't feel that there was much to adapt to this time when I got back. Familiar faces as well as new ones and it's always pleasant to get to know more people as each semester passes. Great feeling, isn't it? Somehow, I think I'm on a holiday and I miss Singapore. August is ending and it will be November very soon. I miss Singapore, see you in November.

"You never really understand the concept of love until it’s placed in your hands for you to care for. To nurture. Not until it smacks you in the face and leaves you starstruck, do you realize how powerful it really is, and only then does it become something more than a four-lettered word. And when you finally pick yourself up off the ground from the fall, you’ll realize that the fall wasn’t so bad after all. From that moment on, you’ll notice that colors are brighter, and music is softer, and life just makes a little more sense. You’ll realize that your heart does beat for a reason, and that reason is love… Love is the only thing that can make you feel whole and empty at the same time. You feel empty because you’ve given your heart to someone, but at the same time, whole because someone has given you theirs to fill the space. And yes, you can choose to run from it, because it can get scary at times, but when you get where you’re going, it might not be where you want to go after all. And when you decide to turn around, love might not still be there waiting. So when it does knock you off your feet, catch your breath, wipe the dirt off your shoes, and run with it. Because it’s the scariest, the worst, the best, and the most amazing thing you’ll ever feel in your entire life."